Check-In 6/21/20: What even is this month?

I missed a couple weeks checking in. Oops. It was my birthday on the 10th, so I was enjoying birthday weekend revelries with my boyfriend.

CW: Menstruation

Then, as though God had to counter all the enjoyment I’d been having, on the Monday after I began one of the shortest, but worst, periods of my life. I really thought I might die on Monday, and a good portion of Tuesday. My actual period finished up on Wednesday, so it only lasted three days, but I’m pretty sure I bled more in those three days than I ever have before. Heavy flows lead to really bad, painful symptoms, like cramping so hard I have muscle spasms in my arms.


You know what other symptoms I have during the first couple days? A fever. Fatigue. Shortness of breath.

Hey, you know what else has symptoms of fever, fatigue, and shortness of breath? COVID-19. Of course, I knew that the likelihood of having caught COVID and showing such intense symptoms so suddenly was highly unlikely. My rational brain knew these were the same symptoms I’ve been dealing with every 28 days for the last twenty years.

An image of a blue alien-like creature sitting at the outline of a table top with their hands pressed together in thought. They look off image to the left with a suspicious expression on their face. Above their head is black text reading
Actual image of my Irrational Brain’s thought process.
Image Credit: Nathan W. Pyle “Strange Planet”

So, I spent the first two days thinking I might be infected. To my current knowledge, I am not. As usual, those symptoms went away by Wednesday morning.

This last week, I started my online summer class. I planned to take anatomy, but after seeing that I had assignments (and occasionally, multiple assignments) due daily, I concluded that class would be best done in the fall, over the full 16 weeks. So instead I’m taking oral communications (aka public speaking), solely because it’s a general education requirement.

I have no problem with that, except that the teacher has apparently never taught online before. I don’t know how the second half of her spring semester went, after the district moved all classes online, but if our first week is any indication I’m pretty sure they all got A’s just because they couldn’t be faulted for nothing working.

Our first assignment was originally due on Friday 6/19 and we are supposed to work with a partner. By Thursday morning, she still hadn’t paired people up. The assignment was pushed back to Monday. It’s been a nightmare. Trying to figure this mess out and start on a class that even the teacher hasn’t really started has consumed me. I’m so irritated.

At this point, I figure June is basically a bust and I’ll start over in July.

Moving gif of a black text shrugging emoji on a white background, animated to look as though it is actually making a shrugging movement.
Image source: Giphy

That’s how it happens, sometimes.


  1. Adie,
    First of all, Happy belated birthday! I’m glad you had fun. So what’s up with your period, woman? Cramps even in your arms? Holy hell no! Surely the doctor can give you something so you don’t have to go through that again! Also, I know that worry about coronavirus. At this point, I’ve had to go to an ER and coronavirus is spiking in our neck of the woods, and today I had to take Bud to the vet and they are busy as ever, and everything feels contaminated. Another blogger I follow just wrote that her son has it. It just feels like coronavirus is closing in. BTW, I love your irrational brain cartoon. Perfect! I feel like that every damned day. Also, how do you do public speaking online? I love when instructors don’t have their shit together, don’t you? I know you’re ready to just hit re-start on July 1, but honestly, the way things are going here? I’m ready to just call it a year. Was it you who asked me last year or maybe it was the year before if I was cursed? My daughter Lauren asked me if we were cursed a couple of days ago. Nah…me and God are tight. Still, there’s always something going on around here. You wouldn’t believe everything just since David collapsed last Thursday. The fun just keeps coming. Okay, I’m going to quit whining now. What are you giving a speech on? Mona

    Liked by 1 person

    • I’m sure my doctor could give me something for my periods, but I can’t swallow pills. And, honestly, I’m very much a “medication as a last resort” kind of person and prefer not to take meds if I can avoid it. At this point, I’m mostly able to manage my symptoms on my own, but for whatever reason this month was particularly bad. Probably from all the sugar I keep rationalizing eating.
      The online communications class is done via a recording application called Goreact. It allows the teacher to limit how many times you can record yourself giving your speech. This way it kind of mimics being in the classroom and giving your speech live, rather than recording a bunch of different takes and then using the best one. Other students can then watch your speech and leave comments/feedback. I’ve never used it before this class, but it seems like a solid program. And my teacher seems to have sorted things out, so that’s also good.
      Our first speech were introductions. We “met” with our partner through the app and introduced each other to the class. Just the basic stuff: This is Jane Doe. Her major is this because of this rason. She works at this place doing this thing. Here’s an interesting fact about her. Once the initial hurdle of getting the application set up for multiple cameras had been taken care of, it went pretty smoothly. I have to record another speech today on my favorite place. It’s another basic speech that our teacher mostly just wants us to do to get used to using the app and all that kind of good stuff.
      I’m actually really glad I decided to take this class online instead of in person like I had planned. It lets me focus on creating good speeches without worrying about the live audience element, which is usually where I trip up because of the anxiety. I feel like once I’m confident in my speech writing/delivering abilities, it will be easier to tackle the anxiety around public speaking later, rather than trying to work out both at the same time.

      Liked by 1 person

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